Girl on Film (Girl on Film)
May. 14th, 2004 06:54 amWell, last night I was unexpectedly productive on the film list, and knocked out Van Helsing and Troy in a single sitting. Go go gadget ass-numbness.
We went up to the Red Bridge 4, on the premise that since we had a movie theater right down the road, we ought to visit it every once in awhile, instead of going all the way up to Ward Parkway. As it turns out, they don't so much take time to turn on the lights and clean the theaters between films at the RB4, so if you are the sort of person who stays through the credits of one film, you're likely to catch the previews of whatever film is showing next. After having suffered through Van Helsing, the other members of the household felt that staying for Troy was sort of the moral equivalent of taking asshole tax. So we stayed in the theater and caught both films.
I have to say, I enjoyed both films, which probably says something about my moviegoing taste. Van Helsing was very stupid, but a lot of fun, and riffed on all the awesome and goofy old Universal Monsters films... and I really liked the inventor monk fellow - anyone who describes themselves as "a genius with access to unstable chemicals" is okay in my book. Everything in the film is madly uneven and varies widely from scene to scene, from the horrible accents to the overall look of the vampires... you get the impression that ILM went to the directors and said, "Hey, we've got seven really cool concepts for vampire effects, which one do you like?" and the directors went, "Perfect! Let's use them all!". The costumes were great, and the masked ball scene, although somewhat ridiculous in context, was worth the price of admission.
Troy, on the other hand, was a reasonably good film. Aside from the obvious appeal of Brad Pitt in a black leather mini-skirt, it has epic appeal, (mostly) well-written dialog, and fantastic battle scenes. I'm a sucker for "big" film-making, and on this count, it does not disappoint. It makes some serious departures from the story as I know it, which left me going, "Huh?" but other than that was altogether decent. And, you know, Brad Pitt in a black leather mini-skirt. I'm about ready to petition for a moratorium on the John Woo/Matrix style bullet-time fight scene though. It's silly enough in gunfights, but in sword-and-shield matches, it's completely ridiculous. Fortunately, the technique is only used in a few sequences, and is over very quickly, almost before you have a chance to ask, "What the hell is bullet-time doing in a swordfight?". So that's good. I'm concerned that the film makes Paris out to be much more heroic than is strictly necessary, but you do sort of spend the first 3/4 of the film wanting to tell him to shut up and sit down. If I'd been Hector, I'd have bitch-slapped him at several points in the story. But maybe that's just me.
We went up to the Red Bridge 4, on the premise that since we had a movie theater right down the road, we ought to visit it every once in awhile, instead of going all the way up to Ward Parkway. As it turns out, they don't so much take time to turn on the lights and clean the theaters between films at the RB4, so if you are the sort of person who stays through the credits of one film, you're likely to catch the previews of whatever film is showing next. After having suffered through Van Helsing, the other members of the household felt that staying for Troy was sort of the moral equivalent of taking asshole tax. So we stayed in the theater and caught both films.
I have to say, I enjoyed both films, which probably says something about my moviegoing taste. Van Helsing was very stupid, but a lot of fun, and riffed on all the awesome and goofy old Universal Monsters films... and I really liked the inventor monk fellow - anyone who describes themselves as "a genius with access to unstable chemicals" is okay in my book. Everything in the film is madly uneven and varies widely from scene to scene, from the horrible accents to the overall look of the vampires... you get the impression that ILM went to the directors and said, "Hey, we've got seven really cool concepts for vampire effects, which one do you like?" and the directors went, "Perfect! Let's use them all!". The costumes were great, and the masked ball scene, although somewhat ridiculous in context, was worth the price of admission.
Troy, on the other hand, was a reasonably good film. Aside from the obvious appeal of Brad Pitt in a black leather mini-skirt, it has epic appeal, (mostly) well-written dialog, and fantastic battle scenes. I'm a sucker for "big" film-making, and on this count, it does not disappoint. It makes some serious departures from the story as I know it, which left me going, "Huh?" but other than that was altogether decent. And, you know, Brad Pitt in a black leather mini-skirt. I'm about ready to petition for a moratorium on the John Woo/Matrix style bullet-time fight scene though. It's silly enough in gunfights, but in sword-and-shield matches, it's completely ridiculous. Fortunately, the technique is only used in a few sequences, and is over very quickly, almost before you have a chance to ask, "What the hell is bullet-time doing in a swordfight?". So that's good. I'm concerned that the film makes Paris out to be much more heroic than is strictly necessary, but you do sort of spend the first 3/4 of the film wanting to tell him to shut up and sit down. If I'd been Hector, I'd have bitch-slapped him at several points in the story. But maybe that's just me.
no subject
Date: 2004-05-14 07:16 am (UTC)By the way, the monk guy is David Wenham, who played Faramir in LOTR and Audrey in Moulin Rouge. Ms. Goodwrench can tell you all about him!
La Greca, as I have mentioned, is very upset about the rating on Troy. She is denied both Greek mythology and Orlando Bloom in one swell foop.
Too damn many italics.
no subject
Date: 2004-05-14 07:36 am (UTC)I have to agree that I didn't really care for The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, but I'm not really into the comic book characters either.
no subject
Date: 2004-05-14 07:41 am (UTC)A Knight's Tale & Moulin Rouge
Date: 2004-05-14 01:29 pm (UTC)Unfortunately I didn't see LXG as a spoof, just a poorly executed steampunk comic adaptation...emphasis on the 'pta'.
Re: A Knight's Tale & Moulin Rouge
Date: 2004-05-14 01:46 pm (UTC)I didn't manage to get LXG as spoof either - the source material is wildly speculative, but generally straight material - a trait which the film unfortunately shared. Had it been a spoof, it would have almost certainly been better. VH, since it had so many elements lifted directly from the monster classics, sort of toes the spoof line - enough for me to see it and enjoy it that way, but probably not enough to indicate that the filmmakers were consciously making caricature.
I keep meaning to ask you
Date: 2004-05-14 01:55 pm (UTC)Re: I keep meaning to ask you
Date: 2004-05-14 02:20 pm (UTC)It's also my humble opinion that the genre gets treated better by animated stuff than by live-action film. We are anxiously anticipating the release of SteamBoy (http://www.steamboy.net/intro.shtml), should it ever actually arrive in the US.
Re: A Knight's Tale & Moulin Rouge
Date: 2004-05-14 03:04 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-14 07:44 am (UTC)Thanks for pointing out Faramir - I'm not really good at identifying actors from film to film, but I knew he looked familiar. (I'm getting better.)
As to the rating of Troy, I can't imagine that it's any more violent than, say, Lord of the Rings. You do get some Brad Pitt ass in bits, though. (This is a plus in my world, but the ratings board takes it amiss).
swell fop....err, foop
Date: 2004-05-14 02:02 pm (UTC)Actually my impression is that the movie got an R rating for the Male!Nudity! rather than the violence; if you can stand her to watch several male actors in profile/three-quarter view (no crotch shots M or F, not even any real breast shots that I can think of) and one very brief sex scene that isn't any rougher than George Michael's Father Figure video, you can decide whether to take her for yourself. It's certainly no worse on the violence scale than the LOTR movies, and those got PG-13, right?
However, there is very minimal mythology, aside from some references to what the (apparently Deist and non-interfering) Greek Gods Will Do When They Get Home!
Re: swell fop....err, foop
Date: 2004-05-14 02:10 pm (UTC)Re: swell fop....err, foop
Date: 2004-05-14 03:09 pm (UTC)Well, I'll be damned.
Date: 2004-05-14 04:08 pm (UTC)Re: Well, I'll be damned.
Date: 2004-05-14 04:14 pm (UTC)Re: Well, I'll be damned.
Date: 2004-05-14 04:34 pm (UTC)You may not want to let her have that life-sized cutout of OB behind closed doors anymore, hon...
Re: Well, I'll be damned.
Date: 2004-05-14 05:04 pm (UTC)