300

[featherynscale]

kittenpants, orcjohn, triadruid and I managed to see 300 last night. For the entire length of the movie, three of us sat there like Beavis and Butthead; "This is the coolest thing I have ever seen. huh-huh, huh-huh". Apparently, the thing was too comic-bookish for triadruid's tastes, and he was disappointed. The rest of us reveled in that.

Beautiful art direction, brilliant action sequences, explosions (the Persians had some black-powder bombs, which I'm not sure are correct to the period, but so what?), nice looking men, an excessively hot queen, revenge, glorious doomed gestures, and a rhinoceros. What's better than that? (Well, it would have been better if the captain's son and the blond Spartan he kept bantering with had actually had sex, instead of merely flirting, but that's apparently too much to ask for.)

The Persians were, on the whole, ridiculous. When I eventually grasped that the story was being told afterwards by a soldier to the council, it made a little more sense. I mean, that's what you'd say, right? "There were six million of them! They were monstrous and deformed, and came riding strange beasts. Giants walked among them. Xerxes himself must have been 12 feet tall, and advanced upon us on a golden throne borne by thirty thousand slaves..." All it lacked was the requisite introduction: "No shit, there I was...."

The big question in everyone's mind after the film (other than "Why is it okay to show that much blood and gore and corpses and naked women and transsexual amputees and all that, and you still get an R rating, but if you show a penis, it's NC-17?" and "Why did the Spartans call the Athenians boy-lovers?" and "Why no soldier-on-soldier sex, dammit?") was this:
At that tech level, how do you get a rhinoceros on a boat, *keep* the rhinoceros on the boat, and keep the boat seaworthy, i.e. with no holes in it from rampaging rhinoceros? Discuss.

Comments

Re: the perpetual question

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

I'm pretty sure, based on previous interactions with rio_luna, that her initial comment was fairly tongue-in-cheek. My request for an answer to the "Why no dick in film" question certainly was, and I was pretty sure that she was giving me a satirical answer.

As a rule, I don't care to hear/read/be around for any generalized disparagement of any gender. I don't even like to listen to people talk about what 'men are like' or 'women are like' even in positive terms. It doesn't seem terribly constructive or useful from any angle, nor is any of it likely be accurate to any given individual. In fact, I am told that I am too hardass on people about it, and that I should, in fact, calm the hell down. I'm still deciding whether or not I should comply with the request.

So, as distasteful as it is to see people get worked up about things that don't seem to warrant the outpouring of doom, it is doubly distasteful to me to see it happen about whether or not men are more evil than women or vice versa. I reject the very ground of the argument. (I also don't usually count myself as a lass, or as having any particular investment in establishing matriarchy, but that's another whole set of issues.)

Also, you are correct. The difference between Colbert and a rhino is perhaps not as wide as I had originally thought. It begs more consideration.

Re: the perpetual question

[kellan-m-solan.livejournal.com]

I will try to refrain from calling you 'lass' in that case. But you have to remember that a large portion of my memories of you involve your being dressed as a pirate, or dressing me as a pirate, and also a liberal amount of drink...

and possibly you calling me lass... }-)