Sort of content-free: Reframing

[featherynscale]

This is gonna be long, and it's probably gonna be dumb. I'm cutting it to spare you both. I'm writing it down, though, because it's sort of a Hey Wow moment for me. (It might be a Well Duh moment for you. In fact, I expect it. Feel free to pass by.)

As it turns out, my household has been talking about trying to eat better. Our hedging justification for this has been something along the lines of "No, we're not interested in dieting to lose weight or look good, or pander to the beauty-industrial complex, but wouldn't it be nice to be a little thinner? I mean, that would make it easier to fit better into the elevators at DragonCon, right? Just a little thinner. Then we wouldn't be so miserably hot in the summer, right?". And so on.

This is, of course, lame. Yes, dieting is lame, and mainstream culture beauty standards are really lame, and there's very little on this earth that is more boring and wretched than a conversation with a person who is obsessed with their eating plan and whiny about what they "can" and "cannot" eat, or who blames you for eating a cookie, or bringing sweets to the office, or whatnot. That is all lame. But even so, our justification is equally lame. We should just do a thing because we want to do it, and not worry about the other stuff.

But I digress. We are looking at the South Beach Diet, which seems to be very effective for people, and not terribly onerous. Both of those things are important, because we don't wish to devolve into Weight Watchers. (Capitalization here is for emphasis, not to refer to the company of the same name. I'm referring to the obsessive weighing and tracking and bitching and feeling powerless and whatnot behaviors referenced above.)

So I am looking at some of the recommended food choices for this plan, and I have discovered that many of the things they recommend you eat are actually things I want to eat. They are things that I would eat independently of being on any kind of diet, if only I thought of them.

Suddenly it occurs to me that much of my eating choices are based on unexamined habit. I choose what to order or what to buy at the grocery based on habit. And some of those things I habitually choose, are not even things that I particularly like. They're just things that I get because I had a really good one once at some other restaurant that no longer exists. Or because they're simple enough that I think there's no way the place could screw them up. Or because they're easy to cook, and I can't be arsed to cook things that aren't easy to cook.

I'm not cool with that. I would much rather make choices that bring me enjoyment than make choices that bring me mediocrity. So now, in about two minutes, this whole 'we should diet' thing has ceased to be about health or attractiveness or fitting into the elevators, and has begun to be about breaking habits and making choices that improve my experience of life. The initial motivations or possible motivations feel stupid to me, but breaking habits and choosing experiences that I will enjoy more seem practically noble motivations to me. If that somehow leads to some other effects, that's all well and good, and if it doesn't, that's okay too.

EDIT: And, gamera_spinning reminds me that it is Lent, which means that suddenly, everybody has fish on the menu. I love fish, and consequently, I love Lent. (I fail at Catholicism.)

Comments

What, you mean like suddenly realizing you don't actually like California Rolls?

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

No idea what you're talking about, sugar.

Re: What, you mean like suddenly realizing you don't actually like California Rolls?

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

I have a theory that nobody actually likes California Rolls. I could be wrong, though.

Re: What, you mean like suddenly realizing you don't actually like California Rolls?

[adammaker.livejournal.com]

I like them!

Re: What, you mean like suddenly realizing you don't actually like California Rolls?

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

Yes, but do you like Actual California rolls, the sort that one can actually get in a restaurant? Or do you like the Platonic ideal of California rolls?

See, I like the idea of them. They sound very tasty. And I have some measure of faith that they could actually *be* very tasty under certain controlled circumstances. In practice, though, they're sort of squidgy and dull.

Re: What, you mean like suddenly realizing you don't actually like California Rolls?

[adammaker.livejournal.com]

Ideally, the California Rolls I like actually contain crab, even if it is cheap crab.
Other, lesser, Cali Rolls have cheap dyed whitefish.
-
I eat many of both types, when I can.

Re: What, you mean like suddenly realizing you don't actually like California Rolls?

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

Okay. I stand corrected. Carry on with your roll-eating ways.

Re: What, you mean like suddenly realizing you don't actually like California Rolls?

[saffronhare.livejournal.com]

I like California Rolls because I am too much of a sissy to like other forms of True Sushi. (Yes, I've tried many forms of True Sushi. I just don't like it.)

So...when I wish to enjoy food in the company of friends who want sushi, I order California Rolls. Much like I'll order guacamole and quesadillas in a Mexican restaurant. There's a reasonable assurance that I'll like it, and that it won't make me ill. (shrug)

Re: What, you mean like suddenly realizing you don't actually like California Rolls?

[fionnabhar.livejournal.com]

I like real sushi AND California rolls. Come to think of it, I'm extremely picky about Mexican food, but I like quesadillas, and I think guacamole is world's most perfect food.

*shrug* At least I won't starve to death. :-)

Re: What, you mean like suddenly realizing you don't actually like California Rolls?

[zylch.livejournal.com]

I like California rolls, as well. Just not as much as I like raw fish, so I tend to get the latter when it's available.

Re: What, you mean like suddenly realizing you don't actually like California Rolls?

[zylch.livejournal.com]

I'm also the sort of person who woke up one morning and decided to be vegetarian because I was bored and needed a new challenge. That lasted for two years before I got bored with the Veggie Way in turn and succumbed to Chicken Finger Thursday. So yeah, your rationale makes utter sense compared to mine.

[greektoomey.livejournal.com]

breaking habits and making choices that improve my experience of life

I'm a creature of habit, and I'm comfortable with that, so for me, improving my experience requires creating new habits. (Though I acknowledge that depending on one's perspective, creating new habits may be the same thing as breaking old habits.) The rest of it, however, is a much better explanation for my morning exercise routine than anything I've been able to come up with. Previous attempts at explaining this have mostly been along the lines of "Apparently, I'm crazy," as I have long considered exercise without a specific goal or purpose to be pointless and insane.

[adammaker.livejournal.com]

Personally, I'm not aimed at a goal of thinner.
I'm aimed at a goal of Healthier.
-
This let's me do what I need to do to keep me happy/heathy, without mucking about in the emotional entanglements of external expectations of body types.

As a side effect, I AM thinner, but that's not my goal.
-
Some of the inspiration for this comes from:
http://www.rmaxinternational.com/forum/showthread.php?t=12935

[saffronhare.livejournal.com]

Yup. A month in which I make good eating and movement choices is a generally going to be a month without pain for me (migraines). It's a nice little reward system.

[lexpendragon.livejournal.com]

I was going to say something to this effect. Don't worry about how you look, because you1 all look good. What is worth worrying about is health, and how that can make you feel.

Another note: From my own personal observation, going on an Atkins, or South Beach, or any other mostly protein styled diet tends to greatly increase the sex drive. This has the added bonus of giving you something other than food to think about, as well as an additional form of exercise.


1 That's a collective "you", all three. Yinz, in my native tongue.

way off tahpic

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

I always learned it as "yens". Interesting

Re: way off tahpic

[lexpendragon.livejournal.com]

I've always seen it as Yinz, as evidenced:

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

From my own personal observation, going on an Atkins, or South Beach, or any other mostly protein styled diet tends to greatly increase the sex drive.

I did notice that, when I was doing the Atkins thing, back when I was in college. Sadly, I had nobody with whom to indulge. So I went dancing a lot (and saved all the carb grams to which I was entitled so that I could drink whiskey when I was out).

I had forgotten about it until you mentioned it. I sort of hope to avoid that effect this time around, it gets fairly perilous.

[lexpendragon.livejournal.com]

I was under the impression you had twice the average number of significant help for that at home.

Especially if they're on a similar diet.

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

That's true, and yet. Peril.

[lexpendragon.livejournal.com]

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you I think it means.

[leiandra.livejournal.com]

If it's not TMI....why Peril?

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

It's probably TMI. I'm likely to tell anybody anything, as long as it only involves me. Answering that question would require talking about other people's personal lives, so I'm gonna refrain.

[leiandra.livejournal.com]

Fairynuff

[ysabel.livejournal.com]

I would IM you with, simply, "PERIL!" but you aren't online.

So I am forced to resort to comments, which just aren't the same.

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

Hey, it's the thought that counts, right?

I had a related realization.....

[matchgirl42.livejournal.com]

Doing things because it's something I really want to do, and will result in a tangible reward that will actually mean something to me, personally? Very easy.

Trying to do things because it's what is expected of me, or to pander to someone else's views of what I should or should not do, etc....utter waste of my time, and doomed to failure....

Re: I had a related realization.....

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

Meaningful quote from Saturday's Wheel of Time game: "If the word "should", as in "what we should do" or "what we should feel" comes out of your mouth again, I'm going to stab you in the ribs."

The power of should is weak and irritating.

Also, and, a possibly helpful link

[matchgirl42.livejournal.com]

Indeed, should *should* be a wirty dord.

Hee.

Also, ya'll might find some verrah interesting things south beach diet-related at South Beach Diet online (http://www.southbeachdiet.com/public/dailydish/dd_20070224.asp). I get a daily email thing from them - although hell if I can remember how I signed up for it...but they send me recipes and general tips everyday. Not that I'm following the diet persay, but I do enjoy the recipes. Just the other day...Coconut Shrimp Curry (http://www.southbeachdiet.com/public/dailydish/dd_20070218.asp). Drool.

Re: Also, and, a possibly helpful link

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

ZOMG curry. I could live off of curry. Seriously. I do prefer it with some rice and flatbread of some type, but I can live without that.

Re: Also, and, a possibly helpful link

[matchgirl42.livejournal.com]

I thought you'd like that. If you don't want to be arsed about signing up for the newsletter, I can send along the recipe links as they come to me...granted, I'm on a freak streak here about getting online every day, and this can't last long; so you'd likely only get an email from me maybe once every week or two...

Re: I had a related realization.....

[saffronhare.livejournal.com]

FWIW -- I only said there I would stab the person. Not exactly where. One must let some things remain surprises, nes pas?

Re: I had a related realization.....

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

Oh, I thought you said you were going to stab him in the ribs. Maybe he said you were going to stab him in the ribs. I get confused. :)

Re: I had a related realization.....

[saffronhare.livejournal.com]

I think he assumed ribs. :) Which would have been great -- since he would have been *expecting* ribs. Sadly, the word *should* was avoided. (le sigh)

Sorry to muck with your ongoing, day-old thread here.

Eat to live

[crookedface.livejournal.com]

What I eat only has to keep me alive. Being diabetic, that means it has to stay reasonably healthy--keeping the blood sugar in the good zone. Lost much weight that way, lose more when I keep from overindulging on carbs....

Re: Eat to live

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

What I eat only has to keep me alive.

That's a totally valid viewpoint, but adopting it would require me to give up some measure of hedonism. I'm not sure I'm up for that; I like my hedonism.

[karinablack.livejournal.com]

Thank Goodness- Weight Watchers bother me.

They're the silly fuckers that don't eat cake at birthday parties.

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

Silly fuckers, indeed. And then they complain when other people do. "OMG Do Not Eat That Cake In Front Of ME! It burns, precious!!"

Lame.

[karinablack.livejournal.com]

Very lame.

Not like they can't just go purge it up anyway.

*smirk*