featherynscale: Schmendrick the magician from The Last Unicorn (Default)
[personal profile] featherynscale
Dear Applicants:

If you are trying to get a job (as opposed to merely applying for one to satisfy the requirements to collect unemployment), it is helpful to list an email contact on your resume. However, if your email address contains the word "wanker", "wankster", any other form of the word "wank", or indeed, any other reference to your tendency to masturbate, you might want to consider whether listing that address is a net gain of any points at all. Now, if your last name happens to be Wanker, that's one thing. But even then, if it were me, I'd think about changing my name.

Yours sincerely,
HR

Re: Heh.

Date: 2006-05-31 08:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fionnabhar.livejournal.com
Making you a wankatrician, then?

Potential Snork Material:

Date: 2006-06-01 06:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wildnsquirrelly.livejournal.com
Not sure. When you put it like that it almost makes me sound like I came to people's homes to take care of their concerns.

"Pipes' still gunked up. Did you call the wankatrician?"

Which, of course, would degenerate to...

"Do you have any idea what those guys charge after regular business hours, on the weekends? No way am I paying that. I'll fix it myself."

And that's got permanent damage written all over it. Sounds like an un-aired Home Improvement episode that ends with Tim Allen's accidental castration. By the same rationale I guess that leaves out referring to myself as a Wankinater. It's probably best to settle on:

Wildnsquirrelly, D.W.

ow

Date: 2006-05-31 08:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] saffronhare.livejournal.com
Pepsi, through the nose.
::snork::

Ow, #2

Date: 2006-05-31 11:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] matchgirl42.livejournal.com
*holds sides*

Oh, that one *hurt*.

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featherynscale: Schmendrick the magician from The Last Unicorn (Default)
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