Nobody walks in O.P.
Jul. 19th, 2004 10:17 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
featherynscaleNecessity (in the form of visible cording) moved me to take Asmodeus in to be reshod on Saturday, at rather more expense than I had hoped, and also at the expenditure of rather more time than I'd hoped. So what's a girl to do, when she's alone and unhorsed in the middle of Overland Park? Walk to the bookstore, apparently. Now, note, this was not an extensive hike I was proposing - six blocks one way, seven at the most. In fact, I gave up the notion of hoofing it to my bookstore of record on the grounds that this would have nearly doubled the length of the trip, and I had to be back to pick up the Black Beast before the tireshop closed. So, no big deal. I am fat, but I am not yet so fat that I can't heave my creaking bulk six blocks.
The thing is that Overland Park is not a friendly part of the city for pedestrians, despite being a generally nice area. There are a number of hazards I hadn't foreseen. The first was the crossing lights. Since nobody in their right mind would walk across Metcalf Avenue, there are crossing lights, as required by law, but they only work every two to three light cycles, and they don't stay lit anywhere near long enough for a human being to actually walk across the street. One has to run, which, anyone who has seen me will be acutely aware, is a fundamentally ridiculous thing for me to do. But I did.
The second hazard is the hostility of the drivers. Being safely ensconced in their steel and glass cages, high above the cares and concerns of the world, many drivers apparently have no qualms about heaping copious amounts of abuse on a mere walker. I have encountered this before, being as I now do a fair amount of walking around my office, but not to this degree. In Brookside, pedestrians are a fairly common site, but nobody would dare offend the earth of Johnson County by placing a footstep on it. Those grounds are sacred, and only SUV tires may touch them. So as I walked, I was accompanied by hoots, catcalls, and extended middle fingers most of the way. I think it worthwhile to mention that I was a fair distance from the road, on the sidewalk, while most of this was occurring, so I find it unlikely that I was giving any direct offense, other than threatening their way of life.
Last, and certainly not least, there are the geese. Unlike most other birds, geese have no covenant with mankind. They eat what they like, they shit where they like, they face down moving vehicles, and they give even less of a damn about a single human on foot. They form a honking gauntlet between 95th and 94th, where the lure of the manmade lake in front of the office towers has made migration unpalatable to them, and they lie in wait for unwary passers-by. The thing about moving through geese is that you have to show neither fear nor food. If you are afraid, they will chase you. If you might be benevolent, they will chase you. They followed me with malice, but did not actually assault me.
Finally, I arrived at the bookstore, bought most of the things I came for and a few things I didn't, and made a second pass through the obstacle course back to the tireshop. I threatened the geese with a hardback, and they gave me a polite corridor. I would have threatened the drivers in the same manner, but in Overland Park, the police are bored, and I refuse to give them an excuse to speak to me. Bad enough I was out without a car - apparently that qualifies one as vagrant in some parts of the world.
The thing is that Overland Park is not a friendly part of the city for pedestrians, despite being a generally nice area. There are a number of hazards I hadn't foreseen. The first was the crossing lights. Since nobody in their right mind would walk across Metcalf Avenue, there are crossing lights, as required by law, but they only work every two to three light cycles, and they don't stay lit anywhere near long enough for a human being to actually walk across the street. One has to run, which, anyone who has seen me will be acutely aware, is a fundamentally ridiculous thing for me to do. But I did.
The second hazard is the hostility of the drivers. Being safely ensconced in their steel and glass cages, high above the cares and concerns of the world, many drivers apparently have no qualms about heaping copious amounts of abuse on a mere walker. I have encountered this before, being as I now do a fair amount of walking around my office, but not to this degree. In Brookside, pedestrians are a fairly common site, but nobody would dare offend the earth of Johnson County by placing a footstep on it. Those grounds are sacred, and only SUV tires may touch them. So as I walked, I was accompanied by hoots, catcalls, and extended middle fingers most of the way. I think it worthwhile to mention that I was a fair distance from the road, on the sidewalk, while most of this was occurring, so I find it unlikely that I was giving any direct offense, other than threatening their way of life.
Last, and certainly not least, there are the geese. Unlike most other birds, geese have no covenant with mankind. They eat what they like, they shit where they like, they face down moving vehicles, and they give even less of a damn about a single human on foot. They form a honking gauntlet between 95th and 94th, where the lure of the manmade lake in front of the office towers has made migration unpalatable to them, and they lie in wait for unwary passers-by. The thing about moving through geese is that you have to show neither fear nor food. If you are afraid, they will chase you. If you might be benevolent, they will chase you. They followed me with malice, but did not actually assault me.
Finally, I arrived at the bookstore, bought most of the things I came for and a few things I didn't, and made a second pass through the obstacle course back to the tireshop. I threatened the geese with a hardback, and they gave me a polite corridor. I would have threatened the drivers in the same manner, but in Overland Park, the police are bored, and I refuse to give them an excuse to speak to me. Bad enough I was out without a car - apparently that qualifies one as vagrant in some parts of the world.
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no subject
Date: 2004-07-19 09:13 am (UTC)But yes, the reason I detest living in mid to southern Johnson County is because the populace is so easily disturbed by things out of -their- norm. It's kind of like California, except a lot less drugs and all night debauchery.
I never got catcalls, but then you have nicer curves than I do. Another item I have noticed is an Arayan mentaility out there in the high society area. One must work towards beauty, or be shunned for uglying up the local gene pool or something. Being hefty is tolerable as long as you make yourself look like a hefty Martha Stewart. Rosanne Barr is an eyesore, just like those people who litter the sidewalks (which is really just pinstriping for the acreage) and the vehicles I drive.
Threatening the Yuppie Way of Life
Date: 2004-07-19 09:17 am (UTC):-P
Admittedly, I was wearing my "Magically Delicious" shirt at the time.
Re: Threatening the Yuppie Way of Life
Date: 2004-07-19 09:20 am (UTC)Some may loose up to a week's worth of sleep. ;-)
Re: Threatening the Yuppie Way of Life
Date: 2004-07-19 09:40 am (UTC)Re: Threatening the Yuppie Way of Life
Date: 2004-07-19 09:42 am (UTC)Re: Threatening the Yuppie Way of Life
Date: 2004-07-19 10:01 am (UTC)Re: Threatening the Yuppie Way of Life
Date: 2004-07-19 10:06 am (UTC)Re: Threatening the Yuppie Way of Life
Date: 2004-07-19 10:11 am (UTC)But yes, moving into their turf and not folloing their rules is always the sweetest 'revenge'. ;-)
Re: Threatening the Yuppie Way of Life
Date: 2004-07-19 10:22 am (UTC)Re: Threatening the Yuppie Way of Life
Date: 2004-07-19 10:23 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-07-19 11:25 am (UTC)We were equally frustrated by JoCo when I worked for NFL security at Arrowhead.
Could not convince the JoCo crowd to car pool They would have a group of 20 show up in at least ten cars Southern JoCo new money very Flash and new toy minded
A lesson in how not to slip in to the very material world
no subject
Date: 2004-07-19 11:38 am (UTC)I had just sort of idly asked whose car they were taking to an event, his or the other VP's. He looked confused and said basically, "I'm driving mine and he's driving his." So I was like, "Oh, I thought you might carpool, since you're going to the same place, you know, save gas?" So he says, "Why? I can afford gas," like I'd been insulting his bank account. *blink, blink*
no subject
Date: 2004-07-19 12:23 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-07-19 04:00 pm (UTC)::sigh:: I've gotta start biking to work again.