Insomnia

[featherynscale]

I was wondering why I whine so much about things like not being able to sleep in my journal. This morning, I realized it was so that when I'm wondering how long it's been since I last got any decent sleep, I could go back and check. Clever, me. So apparently it's been a few days longer than I thought, since I first started talking about not sleeping on the 30th December. Six days, not two or three. No wonder I'm tired. No wonder I wanted to cry this morning when triadruid came in to get me out of bed.

Something needs to change in this game. Normally when I can't sleep, it's because I can't breathe. I wake up startled and fuzzy-minded, and immediately go back to sleep. This is not that. I wake up fully present, and can't go back to sleep for 15-30 minutes. I thought it was the cold meds (stimulants, after all), but I haven't had any cold meds for a couple of days now, and still, not the sleeping.

Next thing I know, I'll be getting night jobs as a projectionist, or sitting up all night writing goetic evocations of Snuffleuphagus (or not - I'm pretty sure that knowing a spirit's true name and nature are prerequisites for evocation, and not only do I not know how to spell the name of the beast, I had a difference of opinion with triadruid last night over whether it was intended to be a mammoth or an anteater.)

Comments

Insomnia IS a Bitch

[drummel.livejournal.com]

You have my sympathies, for I too once suffered the frustration of sleepless nights. What eventually helped me was the purchase of a small fan that created an ambient noise to which I could focus my attention, and perhaps briefly escape the barage of thoughts attempting to get attention like a small child banging a pot..But it wasn't that easy. It was at this point that I honed in my focus on meditation; I'm sure you've come accross many methods, yet what I use is also a self-hypnosis technique. I will strongly visualize a black board with chalk and an eraser. Then choose a number to count down from.. visualize the chalk slowly writing that number, hearing the noise as well. Then take the eraser and again see and hear the number being erased, with chalk dust and residue remaining as well. Continue to do so, while suggesting the idea that you falling asleep.. If you start being interrupted by other thoughts try a thought Stop method. Which is basically...as mentally loud as possible you yell. STOP! Then in the brief moment you have peace..immediately focus on your visualization again..or the fan. Also consider your insomnia may also be the effects of hormones caused by wrong medication dosage.. My mother, who is bi-polar, often has to have her medication tweaked many times throughout the year, as the level of stress or perhaps just a major change in weather could effect her moods. I hope you are able to get some rest soon, BOTE.

Re: Insomnia IS a Bitch

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

Actually, doing some sort of hardcore ritual/mental work was on my agenda for this evening - it does have the feeling of over-processing/mind ramble, and I was thinking that if I worked the mental faculties to exhaustion before going to sleep it might help. Or not :)
The meds are probably not the issue - I'm not on anything psychotropic, and my hormone pills are a steady-dose replacement for a gland I no longer have, and I don't have any of the other constellation of symptoms that imbalance in dosage causes.
Thanks for sharing your exercise, I've been remiss on my meditative practices of late (read: for a few months now) and need to get my ass back on the road.