More Family Fun
Jun. 9th, 2005 08:32 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
featherynscaleThe sister's wedding situation continues to degenerate.
Now, not only do I have to visit with my father's side of the family on that weekend, I also have to meet my mom and stepfather, and visit both of their families too. Oh boy, a whirlwind tour of guilt-trips and lectures on how disappointing I am to everyone. The hits just keep coming.
Also in the conversation where I discovered this, Mom says to me what is possibly the most astoundingly rude thing she has ever said to me. She says, "I need to tell you something. Your father is in the roofing business." And I say, "Yes, I know that." So she says, "The roofing business in Central Florida is making people rich -- he's got a lot of money these days." And I say, "Good on him, he probably needs it, seeing as he's putting A through college and paying for her wedding, and W just graduated from high school, so he'll be putting her through college shortly." And then she says, "So while you're down there, you should ask him for money. He's got plenty of money, and he'll just give it to the other kids anyway."
It's one of those moments where I can't believe that someone has just said what they have just said. In my family, we hardly ever talk about money -- it's rude. And this from someone who mostly kept me away from that side of the family until I turned 18, by which time it was really too late to form a normal parent-child sort of relationship. My father has discharged any obligations he might have had to me. He doesn't owe me anything. We seldom even see each other. He's got four more kids to take care of (two of which are his, and two of which are his current wife's from a previous marriage) and who do all have a fairly normal relationship to him. I have no claim on him -- I'm probably not even in his will.
So yeah. Add this incident to the previously existing dread, and the contemplation of things I'll be missing in KC, and it is not difficult to see why I don't particularly want to do this trip.
EDIT: First hurdle, er, hurdled. Talked D(at Work) into going out and picking out an outfit for me. Bought a black and tan pantsuit with a mandarin-style top, which astoundingly does not look like a maternity outfit on me. Very nice, if a bit more than I really wanted to spend. D(at Work) then informed me that it would not at all go with any of the shoes I own, "especially not boots". So tomorrow, we are going to go buy some shoes to match.
Now, not only do I have to visit with my father's side of the family on that weekend, I also have to meet my mom and stepfather, and visit both of their families too. Oh boy, a whirlwind tour of guilt-trips and lectures on how disappointing I am to everyone. The hits just keep coming.
Also in the conversation where I discovered this, Mom says to me what is possibly the most astoundingly rude thing she has ever said to me. She says, "I need to tell you something. Your father is in the roofing business." And I say, "Yes, I know that." So she says, "The roofing business in Central Florida is making people rich -- he's got a lot of money these days." And I say, "Good on him, he probably needs it, seeing as he's putting A through college and paying for her wedding, and W just graduated from high school, so he'll be putting her through college shortly." And then she says, "So while you're down there, you should ask him for money. He's got plenty of money, and he'll just give it to the other kids anyway."
It's one of those moments where I can't believe that someone has just said what they have just said. In my family, we hardly ever talk about money -- it's rude. And this from someone who mostly kept me away from that side of the family until I turned 18, by which time it was really too late to form a normal parent-child sort of relationship. My father has discharged any obligations he might have had to me. He doesn't owe me anything. We seldom even see each other. He's got four more kids to take care of (two of which are his, and two of which are his current wife's from a previous marriage) and who do all have a fairly normal relationship to him. I have no claim on him -- I'm probably not even in his will.
So yeah. Add this incident to the previously existing dread, and the contemplation of things I'll be missing in KC, and it is not difficult to see why I don't particularly want to do this trip.
EDIT: First hurdle, er, hurdled. Talked D(at Work) into going out and picking out an outfit for me. Bought a black and tan pantsuit with a mandarin-style top, which astoundingly does not look like a maternity outfit on me. Very nice, if a bit more than I really wanted to spend. D(at Work) then informed me that it would not at all go with any of the shoes I own, "especially not boots". So tomorrow, we are going to go buy some shoes to match.
