Yeargh.

[featherynscale]

Let me join today's parade of the disaffected just for a little bit here.

I'm playing the game right now of preparing to be laid off. Some time between this Friday and the end of May, I'll be out of a job. Nobody will tell me when. So I'm trying to get ready to go at any moment.

Part of that is the old spiffing-up-the-resume, prepping-for-the-interviews dance. It's come to my attention recently that all the sharp interview clothes I used to have either have fallen apart, or no longer fit, or are so out of style as to be laughable (which I only care about in the context of interviewing; in order to present the appearance of good corporate drone, one must also present the appearance of good consumer).

So triadruid went with me on Saturday to buy a new interview suit. Sadly, the trip was fruitless, as apparently no matter how much weight I put on, I will still always be several sizes larger on the top than I am on the bottom. I tried on outfit after outfit, only to find that the pants were too big and the jackets were too small. Apparently, if I wish to have professional-looking clothes, I will have to either buy them very very large and have them tailored down to fit, or make friends with someone with similar tastes in clothing who is significantly larger in the bottom half than the top half and trade.

I think I really only loathe my body when I have to buy clothes to fit on it. Apparently, there is a shape that people are supposed to be, and I'm not it. I can usually approximate by buying women's tops and men's pants, but even that's not a guarantee. More manifestations of my neither/nor sort of gender, I suppose.

Also, I've been reading an essay book about genderqueerness, and other forms of alternate gender presentation, which has been interesting, but also weird to me. The weird is possibly because I really don't feel political about my lack of gender, and other people who experience gender differently than the average bear seem to be *very* political about their gender experience. Or maybe it's only people who write about it. I don't know. And too, a lot of these authors are people whose gender issues were a lot more alarming to them than mine are to me. I mean, some of these folks went and had surgery about it, which is cool, but not the road I want to go down. I just can't envision a way that they could cut me apart or put me together that would make my body match my brain any better. Although, I suppose if they cut off my tits, it would be a lot easier to buy a suit. :-/

Comments

[starwyse.livejournal.com]

I hate to shop for clothes too. I know a couple of kick ass tailors/seamstresses if you need a connection...

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

I'd appreciate the recommendations. Thanks! :)

[starwyse.livejournal.com]

email comin' atcha

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

Yay!

[rougewench.livejournal.com]

Being of similar bodily construction myself, I never interview in suits. I only ever interview in a simple dark skirt, with a shell style long sleeved blouse which downplays the bust, but still looks elegant and businesslike.

With 2 1/2 inch heel simple dark pumps.


D.

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

I have gone that route in the past, and may do so again. Interview clothes are sort of another kind of drag, in my mind. I'm really trying to find a way to make the concept of interviewing successfully intersect with the concept of wearing pants, though.

[rougewench.livejournal.com]

Hmmmmm, I would think then, that the route to go would be a coordinated set of slacks, a shell top and a jacket...but not a formal suit...meaning the pants and jacket coordinate with regard to color - perhaps complimentary colors, but are not literally a matched set...so that way they could be bought separately.


D.

[fionnabhar.livejournal.com]

This same thing can be done with the addition of a contrasting, yet complimentary, suit jacket, which can, of course, be purchased in a different size from the pants. I'm thinking maybe a dark skirt or pants, white shell, and gray jacket.

[celticwhistlin.livejournal.com]

Don't touch the tits! I understand the big on top smaller on the bottom (though I suspect your ratio is much different than mine). I find that I have to not buy paired outfits. I have to find stuff that can mix and match and just get the pants smaller than the matching top size should be.

I love Walmart for that reason btw. I don't know how much issue you have with them (as some people do) but that's where I get most of my *nicer* stuff. Granted it's not top of the line but it still looks nice.

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

Yeah, am looking for suiting separates now. It's not as easy as you might think!
Also, we did ask the Nice Ladies at the shop we were in the other day if they would sell me half of one suit and half of the other, but to no avail. :)

[celticwhistlin.livejournal.com]

LOL! I like the clothes at the Walmart on Roe. They have an ethnic style to them but not as ethnic as the Walmart in KCK. I have also heard that the Walmart in Bonner has some nice stuff. Haven't seen it myself...

[fionnabhar.livejournal.com]

Bonner is no great shakes. I have a hard time buying nice stuff there. It's heavy on the sport/casual stuff.

[celticwhistlin.livejournal.com]

Ah. I have personally never been there. I have found the Roe Wallyworld to be high on the nicer stuff. Don't know why but they are. The KCK one is just a bit to ethnic for me. The Roe one has colorful flare that I like. To each his own though...

[fionnabhar.livejournal.com]

We should totally open a big-boobs-little-butts boutique. We'd make a killing.

[celticwhistlin.livejournal.com]

That's so true! While I wouldn't say I have a small butt, when it comes to clothes in comparison to the projected size of the bust... well, you've seen me.

K has an even greater proportional issue than I do... but then, this is why I *LOVE* bodices!

[tjstein.livejournal.com]

I've had a bit of luck at Dillard's lately. I have a large chest but with a large ass and small waist. I always have to alter the waistband of every pair of pants I buy. The best bet is to steer away from suits and to get business separates. That way you can fit each part of your body separately.

Also, I sew pretty well and used to do alterations for a living if you're ever in a pinch.

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

I will certainly take a look at Dillard's -- thanks!

A couple unexpected places to wander through

[sky-pilott.livejournal.com]

If the price isn't too far out of your range, take a look at Men's Wearhouse across from OP Mall. Dunno just how much they have for you but the last time I was there I saw a couple women shopping for slacks and jackets. Slacks, jacket, a blouse, pumps, and one or two accessories might do well for you.

Have you tried the Sears at 95th & Metcalf? They used to have a surprising assortment of men's sets and separates. They'd probably have a similar variety for women too.

Someone else I know who was looking for interview wear had good luck at the JC Penney's outlet around 75th & I-35 and the Half-off Half-off store (I think that's the name) just south of the south-west corner of 87th & Quivira.

Re: A couple unexpected places to wander through

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

Very clever, you are. I have never been to the Half Off Half Off store, although I drive by it all the time. I'll have to check it out!

I cannot brain today, I have the dumb.

[matchgirl42.livejournal.com]

Okay, let's try that again, shall we, with the correct tag format?

Yes, yes...career/business separates. Not sure if it's the style you're looking for, but Target, for example, has a "Isaac Micrahi Ebony Sateen Collection" (http://www.target.com/gp/detail.html/ref=br_1_8/601-2039356-4292951?%5Fencoding=UTF8&frombrowse=1&asin=B000CQBJSE), in a somewhat wide range of sizes. :)

Also, I know you're more of a pants girl, like me, but I would just like to add that you look fabulous in skirts. I'm just sayin'.

Re: I cannot brain today, I have the dumb.

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

The link works now, but it doesn't go anywhere :) That's okay though, I know what you're saying.

For the record, I do not look fabulous in skirts. I look sort of ridiculous in skirts. And I'm always concerned that I'll be showing people my bits.

Re: I cannot brain today, I have the dumb.

[matchgirl42.livejournal.com]

*grumblemutterfuckgrumble*
*sigh*
See? I have the dumb today. I think I caught it from the girl in credit/accounts receivable; see today's post.

Try this link (http://www.target.com/gp/browse.html/ref=sc_fe_l_1_1041790_9/601-2039356-4292951?%5Fencoding=UTF8&node=15358701). If that fails, you can get to it easily from the main Target page; Click on the Women category, then click on "suit collections" under the clothing category. There.

And I think we can respectfully disagree on the skirts thing. But really, though, you trump, because you're the one wearing, or not wearing the thing, as it were. So I will wholeheartedly support your right to not wear a skirt. :)

[marichanlj.livejournal.com]

Umm...gee, I wouldn't think this whole process (of being fired, etc.) as being rather pleasant regardless. The prospect of having to look for a new job is *not* something I would deal with well at all.

It almost sounds like you've been through this before? I've been lucky to keep the same job for some time now before and after my transition, to which I feel more than lucky. Not that it hasn't kept me from pushing the boundaries a bit as far as transqueerness goes at the work place. ^_^;;

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

I'm through this all the time. Every job I've had since I was in my last year of college has ended in the company being bought out and everyone laid off, or in the loss of a major client (through no fault of the company I was with) which forced a ton of layoffs. I think this will be three times in three years. No, wait. Three times in two years. Anyway, it makes you sort of numbed to the process.

Good on you for staying in the same place through your process. I always wonder how that works out for people.

[marichanlj.livejournal.com]

Ehhhh? Three times in the last two years??? Numbed to the process?? I guess...

I'm getting the feeling that I'm rather old world here. I was very lucky to have the kind of job that actually did allow me to transition in the work place and not get fired. In a way I have someone else to thank who transitioned about a year before I did and I saw it *could* be done.

OOps...time for NCIS tonight...Abby!!!! ^_^

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

You're lucky, both in the stability thing and in the having someone go through the process ahead of you thing. I'm not transitioning, of course, but if I were, I can't imagine that it would go over well here. At the moment, I'm reasonably sure they just think I'm a lesbian, which is rarely an issue, but sometimes earns me some on-the-job weirdness.

[ysabel.livejournal.com]

I'm not particularly political about my genderqueerness either.

Here's where I'm going to totally be rude, even though I don't mean to be.

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

Were you apolitical throughout your whole transition process? You also transitioned while doing the same job, right?

Nah, not rude.

[ysabel.livejournal.com]

Pretty much and yes, respectively. I don't like small-p politics or large-P Politics much, frankly...both involve too much dishonesty for my tastes. Even the efforts to bring honesty to politics just seem like pissing in the wind to me.

I have pretty much always been "quietly" out (about nearly everything, not just being genderqueer), in that I don't push anything on anyone. Then again, when we get to talking about spouses at work, I talk about my spouses just as casually as anyone else, and suchlike. I find that simply treating it as a fact, just like other people treat their (mono) spouses as a fact, settles most people pretty quickly. Similarly, the times when my gender has come up at all, just being matter-of-fact, comfortable and confident means that people have trouble not treating you as a person instead of a stereotype. That seems to do more good in any immediate sense (next time those people run into someone who's obviously TG, they're likely to be a bit more thoughtful on first pass) than any politicking I could do.

Of course, I also know Tae Kwon Do, and am good at projecting, "I am a bigger predator than you are," when I have to, which helps to keep the extreme cases down. People are intimidated on first glance by Joel, and my being generally Fae keeps people from seeing the scary most of the time...but then again, the Fae could be pretty damn scary when crossed... I've never been successfully *-bashed for any of my weirdnesses, though I've been in a couple of tense situations.

And I'm rambling, somewhat stupid from work (90+ hour weeks for three weeks now, hopefully that's over for a while this week). But yeah, maybe that made some sense.