featherynscale | Bad movie night, and me vs. the DVD

triadruid and I went to see Blade Trinity tonight.

kittenpants wanted no part of it. It was not as bad as we'd feared. It was definitely better than Blade II, but not as good as the first one. You do the math. And you know, I'd heard that there was going to be a Nightstalkers movie. I just didn't realize this was going to be it. I was a little disappointed in that, but hey. It happens. Maybe they'll skip Nightstalkers and move on to Michael Morbius, who is really my favorite comic book character of all time anyway.

The important things though, (as the case often is) were the previews. One film about super-action anti-hero vs. the US government (XXX: State of the Union), one about good cops and criminals vs. corrupt cops (Assault on Precinct 13). Interesting timing on those, politically and culturally speaking.

Also, Constantine. I think I might have to go. Funny, though, I seem to remember Constantine being British. It's been a long time between me and a comic book though, and I was unable to recall the title he appeared in (confusing Hellblazer with Hellboy), so I might not be an authority, properly speaking.

In home entertainment news, I fixed my DVD-ROM so that in theory, it's now region-free. And why? What does this mean? Well, apparently this means I can now order DVDs of Count Duckula from the UK. That's what it means. My all-time favorite cartoon, simply for this scene:

Count Duckula [woozy]: *groans*... Oh! Where am I?
Hoomite: You are in the secret temple of the great god, Ra. You have trespassed into the great Upshe's tomb.
Count Duckula: *more groans* Oh! Oh no! Uh... who are you?
Hoomite: I am Whomight, High Priest of the great god, Ra. And this is my assistant, Yoube.
U-B: Delighted, I'm sure.
Count Duckula: Uh... hello.
Hoomite: Now... who might you be?
Count Duckula: Yes, I got that.
Hoomite: No, who might you be?
Count Duckula: I know, I know, you said that already.
Hoomite: No, you will not tell me!?
Count Duckula: Well, I hardly need to, do I?
Hoomite: We'll see about that! U-B, you try.
U-B: Oh, very well, master. Listen... *clears throat*... I am "U-B", right?
Count Duckula: No, wrong. "I am, YOU ARE".
U-B: Oh! Very well sir, he is "U-R".
Hoomite: So, you are "U-R".
Count Duckula: I am not! I am not!
Hoomite: Ah, you are "Knot"! He is not "U-R", he is "Knot"!
U-B: You are "U-R".
Count Duckula: I am NOT "U-R".
U-B: Oh, call me not "U-R". I am not "U-R", I am not "Knot", I am "U-B".
Count Duckula: *clears throat* Look. Let's get this sorted out, okay? I am NOT "Knot". Okay?
Hoomite & U-B: Okay!
Count Duckula: I am NOT "U-R". Okay?
Hoomite & U-B: Okay!
Count Duckula: Right. You are "Hoomite" and you are "U-B". Okay?
Hoomite & U-B: Okay!
Count Duckula: Whew!
Hoomite: But-
Count Duckula: Yes?
Hoomite: Who might you be?
Count Duckula: *screams, gibbers senselessly* I can't, I can't stand it anymore!
U-B: No, of course you can't stand anymore, we've tied you to the sacrificial altar and serves you right!
Hoomite: Yes, all who trespass in the great pharoah Upshe's sacred tomb shall die.
Count Duckula: Hmm... all...?
Hoomite: You are but the latest of many. Our legends say, that when the great god Ra has had his fill of human sacrifice, then Upshe shall rise from the dead.
Count Duckula: Ahhh, human sacrifice!
U-B: Well, more or less "human sacrifice", I mean, give or take a feather...
Count Duckula: Now, wait a minute, you can't do this to me!
U-B: Oh, you just hang around and see! *giggle*
Hoomite: Enough! In order that our great pharoah Upshe may rule again, He shall have his fill!
Count Duckula: Who, Ra?
Hoomite: And Upshe rises!
*Count Duckula jumps off the altar, and all three start singing*
All: Hoorah and up she rises! / Hoorah and up she rises! / Hoorah and up she rises! / Early in the morning! / Shanghaied by the light of the moon...
U-B: Excuse me...
Count Duckula and Hoomite: Put out from Boston in the middle of June...
U-B: Excuse me! *silence from others* I think I'm geting a bit seasick...
Hoomite: Well, not in here!
*U-B runs out holding his beak to a door. Door opens to reveal Nanny, who looks exactly like a picture of Upshe*
Hoomite: *indicating this* It is Upshe! He has risen from the dead!
Nanny: 'ere... who might you be!
Hoomite and U-B: *prostrating before Nanny* He knows us! He knows us!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Third base!

mmm. Abbot & Costello. For some reason, that sort of thing is funnier to me than just about anything else. Both "Who's on First" and the "Hoomite/UB" bit just about make me cry every time.

_francophile and a friend did "Who's On First" as a one-act when she was in seventh grade. She was NOT the straight man, and I have to say her comic timing was simply brilliant.

Right on. I was very fond of the Animaniacs version, done at Woodstock.

John Constantine, in the comic book, is British. I forget which book he started out with, but he is associated with the magicusers in the DC comic universe; HELLBLAZER is (or was, don't know its current status) part of the Vertigo line.

They remade ASSAULT ON PRECINCT 13? The original was directed by John Carpenter, somewhere between DARK STAR and HALLOWEEN. I'll have to do a 'Net search and see who is helming the remake.

I should have known you would know these things.

triadruid said while watching the Assault preview, "Isn't that a remake of something?". I, as usual, was ignorant. In my defense, cop movies are almost never on my to-watch list.

With the John Carpenter association, I'd neglected to consider it a cop film, but I see your point (LOL)

Yeah, if it's a movie question, feel free to shoot it my way. Not totally encyclopedic, but I have my moments ...

i remember that one almost word for word!

So, were you and

featherynscale separated at birth, or what?

we were obviously attached by the taste center of the brain/

I was pleased to find that I did, too. Except for the "He knows us!" bit at the end, which I had forgotten, and which just about made me fall out of my chair laughing.

My sense of humor is...er...well. Like that.

Oh man... I miss Duckula. You lucky lucky girl.

Bad movie night, and me vs. the DVD

Who-might, You-be

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I Don't Know's on third.

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